dream 1- i seem to have the same dream a lot in different versions, but the main idea is i'm standing in the dark, and i close myself and let go. i float up to the sky, and i'm finally careless. because i'm not thinking about anything. my soul gets like purified (is that even a word? oh well), and my mind is finally cleared of all evil and darkness.
(i need to talk to tori)
dream 2- this one is kind of a nightmare i seem to barely remember about when i wake up, but i know i've had it more than once. this one varies too. i'm always talking to someone, and they will all a sudden will say something like, "the song you dont know what love is reminds me of you. and i will say something like, "really, cause that song reminds me of..my dad." and they'll say that i am like my dad, and i'll start crying and i'll start running.
basically i just dream about someone saying i'm like my dad, and then i'll get pissed and run away while crying.
i think i get that dream because i know i am like my dad, but i dont know how not to be like him. he fucking damaged me. i want michael right now all a sudden. HUG ME MICHAEL.
how come i can start thinking of my dad, and all a sudden i feel like i want to die?
i need to go for a walk.
why do i try to be something i'm not? when i know that it just shows my insecurity? i need to realize that, yeah, last year i was random, funny, and happy, but just because i was like that last year, it doesn't mean i have to be that way this year. people change, and i did.
mom says i need a counselor. but i know i dont.
i can solve my own problems.
i just need to find myself again.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment